Stop. That. Distancing.

***Please don’t get me wrong: stay safe, go outside, don’t touch each other, keep 1.5 m distance and stay Corona-negative!***

Please? Asking for my friends. Everyone is now talking about distance – its everywhere in the news. Let me tell you: this is not good for my friends. They have been ok in the past and before this virus started. A bunch of totally normal LSD (Long Slow Distances) runners. But now? They are being pushed from all that distance-talking:

  • they create sheet after sheet full of nonsense running challenges – soon they will be lost in these columns and rows forever
  • they are being asked by their family members: who are you and what´s that smell?
  • some of them even started to run in loops again and again
  • some consider LSD is not enough and go for long-distance-inline-skating or other extreme sports
  • some wake up in the morning and think it is a normal thing to start the a day with a marathon
  • some open their weekly Strava stats and wonder why this number has 3 digits and a 2 in the front
  • some even say they are haunted by the Devil himself

Please. Give them the races back. And the group runs. The above simply can’t be the new normal – my friends will not be able to stop running soon. Forever running – imagine. No one wants that. This is something for the professionals.

Enough of funny challenges – enough of entering numbers in sheets. Where are the races/runs that punch us in the faces and allow us to rest the week before (and call it tapering) and the weeks after (and call it resting)? We need them back! ASAP!

Some of my friends would – as a first step – also being ok with banning all Germans from running. But let’s ignore them for now. Some are also asking to get the winter back. Waist-deep ice-cold water, snow and mud is what they want. Let’s ignore those too for now.

When I got tired, I slept. When I got hungry, I ate. When I had to go, you know, I went.
And so, you just ran?
Yeah.

Forrest Gump